Sometimes when I’m reading motherhood and family flavoured blogs – which I still do, (uhumm…. far too often), I wish I could go back and start all over again.
Sometimes……with a deep desire to do the mothering thing right this time and just cancel out the way back when I was a fresh-faced and hugely motivated but a clueless 20-something-full-time mommy, with time on my hands, energy in my legs, few pennies in my pocket and no experience required or forthcoming…..
Yes. I want to go back and re-access the starting line.
With far less irritation, intolerance and copious corrections, you should haves and more baking for breakfasts and chocolate bribery. What if they’d gone to bed with dirty feet and messy rooms and lived with far more fun and frivolity? What if I’d put the book on Perfect Parenting down before that just-one-more-chapter and dragged my body from my afternoon bed and been the perfect-playing parent – in real life?
And then I come round and say to self: Why this thinking?
What if I did everything perfectly in the eyes of the Word according to Blog?
What different kind of a child would I have wanted to produce?
Yes, I ask myself these questions when I’m reading motherhood and family flavoured blogs.
And the answer is…………(drum roll, please)
Nothing. I would do absolutely nothing different.
Nothing at all. As you know what, I think my children have turned out fabulously and perfectly just right. For us and for them and anyone else who cares to cross their paths.
Not perfect. But perfectly just right.
I’m allowed to say that. I’m their mother!
Mothering is no easy task. Its hard and demanding and there were times I wanted to cop out and go on holiday – without them. The privilege and the burden of doing it “right” often didn’t parallel to the perfection I longed for in me or the boys. But now, nearly 30 years later, I cant tell you how satisfied we are with our lot (and the wife we picked up along the way), and how puff-ed up with proudness they make us, just for being them and at what they have accomplished and what they are doing – in their worlds and for the world.
Perhaps the one thing we did correctly is to teach our kids to follow their hearts and find their own dreams. We never cared what path they chose as long as they loved what they did and did what they loved. Nothing has changed and all have found their grooves in what could be called non-conformist ways and all are as happy as Larry and living the life.
Ahhhh, exhale……and all this despite our parenting skills or lack thereof. Stuff happens and our stuff just turned out right. Sjoe!
So on the eve of new changes in our family as Damon ditches the desk life and goes downunder to re-student his life at Hillsong Bible College in Sydney and Rory swopped his suit for shorts on pool decks guiding swimmers in body and soul and at the same time putting the finishing touches on his latest e-business venture and thinking about those yet to come. While Carla charms the skies with her winning smile and caring gestures and listens deeply to those terra firma…..all I can say is thank you.
Thank you God, that you made them. And you made them good and where we failed you made up the deficit and you, God, you done good. And immeasurably more than we could ask or ever have imagined. Thank you.